monobeartheater:

verylittlebird:

a magician asks you to pick a card - any card, in fact. you do. they ask you to put the card back in the pack - anywhere in the pack, in fact. you do. they walk away. ten years later, your wife gives birth to the six of clubs. “is this your card?” the midwife asks, in a familiar voice.

what the fuck

(via nico-diangelcakes)


cantwaitforpizza:

cantwaitforpizza:

cantwaitforpizza:

the sun has come out

the sun is gay

*white girl voice* why are the hot ones always gay

(via infinityc0re)


(via lipcoolers)




nibit:

420 is so close I can almost taste all the bad jokes I’ll have to weed through

(via asian)



when you taking a sneaky picture and the flash go off

when you taking a sneaky picture and the flash go off

(via yeahimsobear)


(via armoredmoth)


emoij:

When you don’t understand something in class but everyone else does 

image

(via pizza)


(via unimportant)


hi:

seeing your friends when you’re with a really cute person

image

(via pizza)


cybercum:

*hears footsteps* *closes 12 tabs and goes to facebook*

(via orgasm)


I really hate when I put food in the microwave and it starts popping and making explosive noises so I check it and it’s freezing cold like why you gotta play me like that

(via drinking)


unimportant:

captainmorqans:

are we gonna say anything about the gagged bieber cutout or

Reblogging for justin


(via cumfort)